If your chicks leave the nest
When my son finished 18th (and the school was), he moved into an apartment with two of his colleagues. We were children during the years of high school was known and the apartment just ten minutes from home, but I cried for two weeks!
It seemed that a large part of my life was over. If your children are small and assume that it will always be necessary, so that the traces of Lego bricks all over the house and the ring around the bathtub dirty mud accumulated from everything they havebuild cubby houses down the yard.
But they are not. Grow up and want to spread their wings and live their lives.
If your children leave home
My son told me he wanted to leave the land, not because he loves us or we want. It 'been a good job, because we raised him had done, to be independent and confident.
Finally, I saw the logic, and made me realize that our children are listening. We spentFor 18 years, encouraged him to march to the beat of their drums, and should not blindly follow others, and now do just that.
When they return
Within six months, asked if he could return home - it cost more than he had thought it would be to live independently (we) acted surprised, and he at the University, does not really have enough time to do laundry, shopping, housework, and study ... (Once again acted surprised).
New ways ofLIVING
But we all knew it would not work if he moved, and we tried to live as we did when schools. In addition she, her sister, her room the day he retired appropriate! That has turned into a rather small study-cum-living for himself and was not ready to be evacuated without a fight.
Luckily we had an incident room at the other end of the house that was in his domain. Had its own entrance and could come and go withoutconcerns us. He could stay as long as he wanted without us telling him to turn off the lights, etc.
Basically, all using the same rules, but has changed their merits.
We had to the fact that it is now all important decisions about his life, and we could not treat as a child to be adopted. But he also accepted that he owed us some kindness - he always called to let us know if late (at home we should have no worries, and so we can arrange a meal).He let us know where he went and with whom (as a courtesy and in case we had on his fate to a friend who called Passport).
He is now 30 and married, and he and his sister moved in and out of the house several times after that the state of their finances, leasing and foreign travel.
The secret of a successful, stress-free living with adult children is all in your head!
Have A Little Faith
Note that you have given all their values, beliefsand attitudes and confidence in the way they have trained them. She can not afford to criticize the way they do things) (or their taste in music, clothes or friends. Put yourself in their place and remember how it feels when someone laughs at something of value, and bit my tongue before you even make a slight heart remarks their latest CD or hairstyle.
Practical
On a practical note, you should try to give the greatest number of separate living space as possible. Somewherewhere your star is likely to limit its music, TV, video, computer or whatever else is important. A comfortable chair for reading, writing desk and ample space for students is also essential.
If you have a room with private bathroom, it is worth giving out, so that your child has more privacy. You and your spouse can enter with the main bathroom and remove another source of potential conflict (criticize the way the bathroom is on the left). Visitors canFrom the main menu use the bathroom and that you are looking for friends.
With just a bit 'of planning and cooperation, we can live with your adult children a real treat for everyone.
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