Marriage Counseling - 3 Tips For a Successful and Happy Marriage
A successful marriage is very relative. What I consider success may not be the same for you and vise versa.
Some use their long years of marriage to determine their success (even if all those years were spent at each other's throats, like roommates or being miserable). Therefore, for some couples, a successful marriage could be considered a great achievement or triumph against all odds.
Although I want to accomplish a great achieve in my marriage, I also want it to come with some amount of happiness and enjoyment.
Therefore, it is on this premise that I will give 5 tips that can help you to not only have a successful marriage, but also a happy one.
Vision
When we were younger most of us knew what we wanted to achieve in life. In the same way, we need to have a vision for our marriage. We need to have an image of our marriage in the next year.
I think about all the great achievers in this world. They had to go though many trial and errors before achieving their goals, but what kept them going was the vision that one day they would make it happen.
Decide that starting today you will become a visionary, a creative thinker a positive spouse.
Friendship
Every successful marriage is built on a great friendship of two lovers. Therefore, before your spouse can become your lover he or she needs to be your best friend.
Ecclesiastes chapter four and verse nine tells us that "two is better than one because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down his friend can help him up, but pity the man who falls and has no one ot help him up". Maybe you are not seeing success and happiness in your marriage because you are not there for each other, if one falls (e.g. has a personal misfortune) the other does not show emotional or physical support.
Sadly but true, some couples start out as best friends but end up as enemies. They fight, argue and knit pick about everything. They simply tolerate each other because they live in the same house.
To change this, I want you to think about the things you generally do with a best friend. You call them up just to shoot the breeze, confide in them about your deepest and darkest secrets, get their input when making decisions, sit and chat nonsense for hours, hang out at the movies, go shopping together and so many other stuff. These are some of the things you need to be doing with your spouse.
Hard Work
Every success in life comes with a price. You end up paying for it through hard work, determination, sweat, tears and sometimes money. Well, marriage is no exception. Do not sit and think everything will just fall into place. No. You need to put your shoulders to the wheel.
Think about when you were dating. You may have put a lot of thought into what you were going to wear to look appealing for your boyfriend/girlfriend (now spouse). Some couples gave each other love notes, were willing to make financial sacrifices, planned exquisite and very romantic evenings together. Some individuals went as far as to write poetry or songs for each other. Where has all that gone?
Hard work also means making compromises. Doing the things that make your spouse happy and being happy while doing it.
Always try to remember that your marriage is not just about what you want but what is best for every one.
